How to Become a Badass?

Every once in a while you come across a person who leaves you awestruck and impressed with the way he carries himself, the way he acts in any situation, and the way people treat him.

He (or she, since such people come in all shapes, sizes and genders) is the one who makes you feel that he has total control over his life. Nothing seems to be impossible for this real life Superman. Heck, it appears that if needed, he could look a tiger in the eye and make it pee in its pants(if it was wearing one), by simply requesting the tiger to do so.

He commands people’s respect. In fact, people compete with each other to grab his attention and feel elated if they succeed in getting his approval.

What you are looking at here, ladies and gentlemen, is a BADASS. 

“Badass is what we all want to, and should strive to become. Because a Badass seems to have it all figured out, which is true. And there’s no way success can stay away from him.”

And here’s the deal : you can be that Badass! Even better, it’s easier than you think. Let me show you how.

Before we proceed further, let’s clear the air around what exactly does being a Badass mean? And we will do so by using a tool called ‘inverting’. Inverting, as the name suggests, involves flipping the question by 180 degrees. You can read more about it in detail here, and use it everytime you come across a challenge/problem statement.

Using it in this case, in order to find out what is implied by being a Badass, let’s start by figuring out what is NOT implied by being a Badass? 

So what does being a Badass NOT mean? Note carefully, being a Badass certainly does not mean:

– behaving rudely with others or showing disrespect, by belittling or ignoring them

– showing up late for meetings or work, unprepared, and still acting cool

– indulging in unprofessional, obscene behaviour

These are simply crass traits, and will ensure that you always come across as an ASS, instead of Badass.

Now that that’s clear, let’s see what does being a Badass mean?

Being a Badass simply means looking after your own interests before anybody else’s, and standing for what’s right even when the overwhelming majority is not in favor of the right thing/not willing to support you.

Being a Badass gets you the respect you deserve. So how do you go about awakening the Badass in you?

1. Start saying NO to most requests/tasks/people
2. Speak less, listen more
3. Work on your mind and body

As with most things in life, start small. Just like we lift lighter weights in the gym when we are a beginner, focusing on our form and building strength, begin by indulging in little acts of Badass’ery’, focusing on the form. 

1. Start saying NO to most requests/tasks/people

How many people do you know(including yourself, maybe) who tell you that they find it difficult to say No to others’ requests. I know quite a few, and they are definitely not my rolemodels. 

This tendency of being unable to turn down useless requests coming your way is precisely what hurts your chances of leading a Wow life, because you are busy indulging others/working for others in your free time when you’d much rather indulge in things you love, such as working out, writing, taking that Spanish class, or simply relaxing & de-stressing at the end of a long day, making grand plans about your future. 

It’s high time you stand for yourself and your priorities and stop sweating the unimportant stuff. Give yourself a challenge to say No to at least one request everyday to begin with.

If you are new to this, you might feel every pore of your body wanting to apologize for turning down the request. In order to ease into the process, next time you are requested to do something that is unimportant and that you genuinely don’t want to, start by saying you’re sorry(even though you shouldn’t be) as that will make you feel less guilty. Then go ahead and give a plausible reason for saying NO – such as urgent work from boss, or a date night, or movie plans (only if you know what movie is running in the theatre) etc. etc. Mention a plan that can’t be changed.

Then forget all about the incident, go ahead and enjoy your me time. And don’t forget to raise yourself a toast for this small yet significant win. 

I am not encouraging you to lie all the time (with enough practice, you should be able to politely say no accompanying it with the genuine reason, such as you are tied up or the task doesn’t interest you or isn’t the best use of your time), but don’t hesitate in using lying as the means while excusing yourself from tasks you don’t want to take up till you have built a habit to say No without having to give a reason. That’s when you become a real Badass.

Also, remember, a real Badass never turns down a request for genuine help.

2. Speak less, listen more

If you have ever watched a gangster movie or a war movie, or even a normal movie, you’d have noticed that the main guys (be it the hero or the villain) don’t speak too often, and when they do, they speak very little. It’s usually the people around them who do most of the talking.

The main guys are usually seen sitting there, listening intently to what others have to say. And when they speak, it sounds intelligent, decisive, to the point and appears to be the final word. That’s why they are the boss.

Sitting silently allows them to listen to the conversation that’s happening around them without missing out on anything, but more importantly, it lets them reflect on what’s being discussed, and decide on their best response. Finally, when they speak, everybody shuts up and listens, coz everyone knows it will be something significant, which it is. And that makes them a Badass in the eyes of the viewers as well as the people around them.

How do you, then, expect yourself to be taken seriously and come across as a Badass if you are busy blabbering all the time?!

So, it’s time to give some rest to that tongue and channel your inner gangster.

Here’s how. Next time, you have a conversation, whether with your boss, your friends, or your partner, imagine you are that gangster from your favourite movie that people have come to speak with. 

Give the other person your complete undivided attention(don’t let your mind wander, bring it back to the conversation if it does), hear everything they have to say(don’t jump in to add something to what they are saying), take mental notes, and let them finish. Once they have finished, take a second before you speak, and then go ahead and put your thoughts across.

If it’s a group of people you find yourselves in company of, let them all have their say. Take it all in. And when everyone has spoken, be the last one to speak, the final authority. 

Use this strategy in every interaction, with friends, with your spouse, with investors, with clients, with your seniors, and in job interviews. Never start speaking right after the other person stops. Always take a moment to prepare yourself and then deliver your views. This makes you appear intelligent, thoughtful and trustworthy. Most importantly, it makes you a Badass, a real one.

3. Work on your mind and body

Make sure you take time out everyday and work on that mind and body you have got coz you only got one. So you better take good care of them.

Go for a run, do a 10 min body-weight workout at home, play some sport, or hit the gym. Exercise not only keeps you fit, and makes you look good, but as science has shown, it also makes your brain sharper. More importantly, it releases endorphins that give you a good feeling and raises your testosterone levels, so that you feel confident and ready to take on the world.

Keeping your brain sharp is equally important. You need to actively work on keeping your brain from falling into a rut. Spend some time everyday exercising that brain. Learn a new language, keep a journal, or write a blog, meditate, do some mental maths, brush with your left hand (if you are right handed, and vice versa), eat healthy foods.

Get yourself some well fitting clothes (or get your existing ones altered). Appearance is the first thing that gets noticed. Dress for the occasion, and remember, there’s no such thing as overdressing. If you were to meet your future partner somewhere, would you rather be overdressed or underdressed? I guess you know the answer.

When you look good, you feel good. You feel sharp. You feel like you are ready to take over the world. There’s confidence in the way you walk around. People can sense it. They feel that they have a Badass amidst them.
You have made the right first impression. Now it’s up to you to make sure you act like that gangster, only speak when necessary and keep your interests first by saying No to unnecessary requests.

CONGRATULATIONS! You are now a BADASS.

“You were born with greatness. You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life.” – Rumi

A life becomes worth living only by staying true to yourself. By speaking your mind out, by saying no to most of the things that come your way (and yes only to things that really matter), by working on improving yourself, by becoming that Badass one step at a time.

Go ahead, give this a shot and tell me how it felt in the comments section below.

Until next time.

– Wowlifer